Monday, 18 August 2014

The Six Sisters of Parenthood

As you begin your journey into parenthood there is advice and information a plenty.  You are told of the sleepless nights, the constant feeding, the babies urge to poop, wee and be sick at any given moment. But what people don't tell you is all the emotions that come with having a child, and how these feelings suddenly appear when you least expect them.  Let me introduce to you the six sisters of parenthood... 

Worry
Ahhh please step forward good old Mrs.Worry.  You may think you were a worrier before, but add a baby and you have a whole lot more to worry about.  It begins with the basic things like are you pregnant, should you eat a grape, then it progresses to are you in labour, was that your waters breaking or a little wee.  Once baby is here, its's are they too hot, are they too cold, are they hungry.  And then you worry if you did this right, did you do that wrong.  And then when you think you have it sussed, you worry about stuff that hasn't even happened yet. What if there is a giant storm and you get washed away, what if you get stranded on a desert island, what is the world going to be like when your child is older...you get the picture.  My personal worry of did I lock the front door and did I turn the hair straighteners off seem to pale in significance (*but quickly runs to check the straighteners are off, I mean we don't want a house fire*).

Guilt
Urgh.  Arguably the ugliest of the sisters is Miss. Guilt, and she sure does like to make her presence known.  I never need anyone to critique my parenting, I do a pretty good job of doing this one on my own.  The guilt if you are a good enough mum, the guilt if you are doing it right, the guilt if you go to work, the guilt if you stay at home, the guilt if you put them in a nursery, the guilt if you don't.  The guilt if you dare to parent differently from someone else. Miss Guilt is an ugly old spinster and she just loves to follow me around.  

Pride
Awww now this sister isn't too bad at all.  She is lovely.  When your little one learns to crawl, learns to walk, learns to say 'mama' or 'dada', you have the most enormous sense of pride that you think you may actually burst.  This pride can rush at you without any given warning. But the thing is with Miss Pride is that sometimes no-one else gets it.  The woman sat next to you on the bus wonders why you look so proud when your toddler has just yelled 'I need a poo' at the top of their voice.  But you are toilet training them and this is a big step...Wohoo! What an achievement, they actually recognised the need to poo.  (Now you just to exit the bus ASAP).  

Random Tears
You know that advert about herbal tea and then the woman finds 'herself' on an island.  Yep, that's the one. After I had had Baba that made me cry.  It doesn't even bloody make sense.   And why are they stranded anyway, silly woman.  Anyway, I digress, my point is that after having Baba I have these flood of emotions that I didn't take a second glance at before.  Miss Random Tears can also strike at any moment.  I hear that cry of a very new born baby and it sends me reminiscing about my labour and holding Baba for the very first time - I even temporarily forget about loading the frozen peas up onto the checkout at Sainsburys.  Not that I had a heart of stone before having Baba, but she seemed to have opened up the flood gates. I also struggled to watch Planet of the Apes, I mean, the poor ape missed his mummy and that's the real reason he was plotting to take over the world (sob!).

Fear
I am not talking about just any fear here, oh no, I am talking about The Fear.  You are in the shop and you turn for literally a split second and your child has disappeared.  Your breathing stops and you literally are paralysed with the fear.  Say hello to Mrs Fear and goodbye to your actual heart beating.  Then said little one pops up from kneeling right beside you.  Dear God. This is the worst worst feeling in the world.  Ever.  I've experienced it once and I never want to experience it again.

Love
So you may think this is a very obvious one. We all know you will love your children, this is the one people tell you about.  But what nobody tells you is that your heart actually grows. You think you love things before your baby, you know like your partner, your dog, your Christian Louboutins.  But when Mrs Love arrives with your baby, the most enormous love invades your heart and your heart actually feels like it has grown ten fold for the amount of love you have for that little person.  It is overwhelming.  It is truly wondrous, and it makes whatever sister of parenthood that is hounding you that day, bearable, and so worth it.   

"Making the decision to have a child - its momentous.  It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body", Elizabeth Stone.


x



6 comments:

  1. I adore that quote and have used it myself on my blog. Great post which I think we can all identify with, especially the guilt for pretty much everything! #ShareWithMe

    http://www.youbabymemummy.com

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    1. Thank you! Yes, I love that quote too!
      Thanks for taking the time to comment x

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  2. Great quote! I love your list too. I can relate to each and everyone of these. I think we ALL can for sure. Thank you so much for linking up to Share With Me #sharewithme

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    1. Thank you and thank you for such a fab linky!
      x

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  3. Fantastic post, all so true and love how you have written it. Those darn sisters eh?! I have wanted to write something about Mummy guilt and the complex emotions of parenting for ages but can never quite put it how I want, you've done it for me though :)

    Beautiful quote as well, I really enjoyed reading all of this :)

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    1. Awww thank you so so much! I wasn't sure if how I had wrote this had come across right...but your comment means so much! You've made my day :-) x

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